“Over the last 10 years I have seen a notable demise in traditional footballer values. I can still remember when there was at least one kiss and tell footballer sex scandal a month, without fail. These days they are all too busy looking in their mirrors to bother to plough the local woman folk. No one even slaps taxi drivers around anymore. A mean, what type of example does this set to youngsters? A lot of players have had their legs waxed claiming it reduces drag when running but given that they dive around so much they may as well be wearing high heels anyway, so why bother. People wonder why Engerlund haven’t won a major competition in over 40 years but when we have players who go in for a tackle that are more concerned about their manicures than keeping their eyes on the ball then what do you expect. If only they had the same commitment on the pitch as they do in the beauty spa.”
The Whippet contacted the Global Footy Monopoly Association (GMFA) to discuss the issue of beauty product abuse by FPL players. The GFMA refused to be interviewed at that time but in a formal press release issued later the same day stated they were unconcerned by the level of beauty products use in the PFL.Further, the GFMA were delighted by the phenomenal quality of hairdressing and praised senior players for mentoring the younger team members with top class personal grooming etiquette, which long term could only be good for the game, as a whole.