Chickenhorq: 2015, Chardonnay, Arsenectar Estate, Sphincter Valley, Manginastan.

This white hails from the Arsenectar Estate, where the old traditional virtues of love, peace, democracy and freedom, are regularly preached in parallel with the exploitation of foreign labour, insane anti-abortion laws and capital punishment.

Unlike a politician’s conscience, this white is almost clear in colour with just a subtle hint of green dollar and a dry desert vanilla nose. Sporting a fully erect fantastical bushy big business texture, the initial dehumanized apple attack is followed with a covert coalition of autumn orchard zesty notes that invades the palate with a cluster bomb of hysterical fruity allegations. Galvanized to a collaterally damaged peachy hydrocarbon chassis, this bold testament to fermentation freedom propaganda finishes with superb whispers of citrus and melon, albeit with a most curiously strong aftertaste of profit driven humid summer barnyard.

Great choice for game or seafood cuisine. Would conspire magnificently with rattlesnake stuffed tapeworms on a parasitic bed of baby leech gudgeons, lathered in a rich cowardly piss of garlic butter napalm phlegm. Good for all occasions but perfect nerve calmer for hiding in the toilets during bar brawls or even a quiet evening behind lines, plotting the exploitation of developing countries. RCN


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